I hate being in limbo. I loathe the uncertainty. I try hard not to be in limbo. Yet here I am: stuck.

I have put my resume in to places with no call. No interview. Admittedly I have been selective about what jobs I apply. Don’t want to saddle myself and my family into the horrendous commute into the city. Still, an interview at least would have been nice.

P’s job, in a word, sucks. Hardcore. It’s almost as bad as it can get. I promise you though his boss/ the owner will find a new way to make it even more hellacious.

Because of above job situations there is always the question,”Do we move back to hometown, NY?”.

In my mind it’s always a yes. There are of course logistics that will be hard. Selling out current townhouse will not be easy. It is worth a lot less than what we paid. We could rent it out, but then maintenance would be a problem.

P talks about starting his own business. But he says he can’t dedicate the time to starting up when he’s working. Well, he can’t exactly quit- his income is our only source of income. I will not dip into our savings.

I also loathe the thought of going back to my career. I didn’t really enjoy it, more put up with it or the sake of money. I could go back to school. For what? I have no idea.

Lots of ‘what if’s’ and ‘maybe’s’. I hate that.


One response to this post.

  1. Hugs hon. This is a rough time for you guys, so much uncertainty. I really hope that something breaks soon that helps you figure out which path you’re meant to travel next.

    Remember, too – some of the MEH right now could be coming down from your tri. I had a week or so after my half where I was pretty down. Sort of a “runners low” after the runner’s high.



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